Marathons, mustaches, and Mardi Gras

No...NO! I can totally take YOU in the marathon!

    I enjoy competition. I enjoy having some beers with the guys while on vacation. And while I often enjoy combining the two, I might have overdone it this time. A few months ago while out on the river with a few friends and just a few beers too many, next year's marathon came up. Allow me to back up a bit...

   Last year one of my closest friends and I agreed that we should find a fun marathon to do together. We both like the rock n' roll series so we started looking there. First thought? Vegas of course! But then after reading stellar reviews like: "They scooped the tepid water right out of the trash can for us!" ...we chose to keep looking. We settled on, what based off of reviews, looks like the best R n' R has to offer: the New Orleans marathon. After all it's one of the nation's must see cities and the race has one of the best marathons reviews in the country. 

Would you like the candy in the trunk, sir?

   Fast forward a little bit, we both have registered opening day for a pace corral 30 minutes faster than either of our marathon pr's. Fast forward a little more to a weekend on the river and an undisclosed amount of alcohol which may or may not have involved a scorpion in a bottle of vodka later, and a slurred challenged was issued. The challenge was thus; if I win my friend must shave his head, (since updated to bic it daily with Facebook updates for proof for 30 days) if I lose I must grow a mustache like the rest of my law enforcement family. Aka, a "cop stach."

   The problem is that between me shaving my head and that having that monstrosity, there isn't a used car dealer around who wouldn't suddenly grow a moral backbone if I asked to see a used astro van.  The bet has gone so far as my friend convincing the local running store to have a "stach growing contest" and mention something about growing your mustache out for your next marathon. Granted, I haven't been in the running world long, but I am fairly certain this is NOT a thing. (I still have no idea how much of his savings he blew to make THAT happen, although kudos to him on what can only be considered a crushing opening blow in the obviously unavoidable upcoming prank war.) 

NOT. A REAL.  RUNNING. THING.

   So, what's a full time student, with full time job to do?? The answer is simple friends. RUN. MY. ASS. OFF. To help prepare I'm calling in favors from all over the state including a elite Boston marathoner as a trainer, a dietitian, the help of several D1 collegiate runners, and hitting the hills with running friends in another city. The opposition however, now lives in the city of Denver, the running and fitness capital of the world. Not to mention that he has the added side benefit of altitude training and will essentially be racing at a sub sea level. One can only hope that his lungs have forgotten how to separate the oxygen from the water in the super-humid swamp land air of New Orleans. 

Steve Jacobs, or as he's known in Denver, "Fat Steve,"
runs a local 5k.

   So please, join me as I keep everyone updated on my progress and my friend's impending shiny head. Oh, and while there is no chance I will be growing the man caterpillar on my face, I do the love the name a mutual friend came up with. Cop Stach Tour 2013. It starts in February with the Rock n' Roll marathon and goes for every race I do next year. Men will cheer, women will swoon, and shirts will be made. Want your race listed on the cop stach 2013 tour? Let me know and we'll add it to the shirt and the 2013 race line up!